Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Setting Boundaries Worksheet

Setting Boundaries Worksheet

If you don't have a good system of boundaries it can be really hard to envision what a boundary is- below is one set of explanations:

If you have good boundaries you CANNOT be a victim!
Fool me once shame on you...
Fool me twice shame on ME!

From Setting Boundaries Worksheet from http://icoach.ca/pdf/Setting_Boundaries.pdf

Relationships are based on underlying assumptions about what is okay to do and what is not okay in a given relationship, and also who is allowed to determine this.

When relationships are based on equality, there is less chance of exploitation. But there are many persons with these assumptions are rarely discussed openly in everyday conversation whom we have contact, who we have been taught to believe have more power in the relationship. This may include those people who are in professional areas, or in authority (eg. employers).

Before one discusses setting boundaries, it is important to make several acknowledgements

  • All relationships have assumptions behind them, based on societal values.

  • These assumptions are rarely discussed openly in everyday conversation.

  • Individuals may have different assumptions about certain relationships and their boundaries.

  • Boundaries may be either physical and /or psychological boundaries {these authors left out emotional and spiritual boundaries- insert mine}

  • Boundaries are related to trust.

  • There can be both negative or positive consequences when persons try to change boundaries.

  • There will often be resistance to changing boundaries from persons who have previously established the boundaries

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